Walletsnatchers of the World RE-Unite!!

We are all drowning. Drowning in a sea of yesteryear, populated by the sharks (that were jumped) and tired old fools of bands long since passed on from this mortal coil. Suddenly, we are beseiged by the soft spongy flesh on clammy hands of resurrected bands desperate to reclaim their abdicated thrones. What are we to do, fair citizens of the planet?
It seems another attempt at breaking down our defences has arisen. A band known as The Verve have set aside their differences (or rather the differences between one slightly skeletal ego-maniac with a failing solo career and one arrogant, proud overrated guitarist who has done nothing since Urban Hymns) for a short tour of these isles.
Where will it end? The Police, The Stooges, The Smashing Pumpkins, Rage Against the Machine, Gang of Four, Pixies - all with their own wave of rancid hype and expectation, soon to come crashing down on us poor, originality-starved saps so willing to endure the sounds and ways of the past. How we mutilate our bank accounts to see these fallen bands attempt to relive past glories! How we suffer the bleatings of 'long-term' fans who claim that they were indeed there first! How we skewer and garotte the hopes and dreams of brand new, exciting young bands willing to play anywhere for no money in order to be heard, by supporting these bloated has-beens!
When will the revolution start dear brothers and sisters? When will it come to pass that the people of Earth stop asking for the ability to download Beatles songs onto their itunes or for their favourite band when they were 12 to reform for a few forty-quid-per-ticket shows? When will sneering nay-sayers cease the endless chattering in defence of these actions, such as: "Why deny new fans the chance to see a band before their time?" Why? Because they have their own future has-beens to cling to, bands that mean more to them than life itself. If we deprive these kids of their right to a modern musical journey, could it be that they lose interest in music altogether? Maybe they will start disowning bands with the disheartening slight: "I've heard it all before." What will become of music?
I implore those who have the ability to stop reformations of these kinds - use your powers, your will and your strength to save music and stop it becoming this endless quagmire of underachievers and glory-hunters.
Do the right thing. Kull the old guard and restore the balance.